#42 No money, no marriage? How much it costs to get married in China 没钱就不能结婚？

大家好，欢迎回来MaoMi Chinese。

今天我想和大家聊一聊一件人生大事——结婚。在中国的文化里，结婚是人生最重要的事情之一。可是，现在，有很多年轻人都不想结婚。为什么呢？因为结婚，太贵了。

很多年轻的男性，因为结婚压力很大。在中国几千年的文化里，有一个词叫“彩礼”。彩礼是什么呢？结婚以前，新郎和新郎的父母，需要给新娘和新娘的家人一大笔钱。需要给多少彩礼钱，每个地方都不一样。有些地方可能需要几千元，几万元，有些地方需要几十万元。

我个人呢，不太喜欢彩礼的观念。因为，女性就像一个商品，她的家庭把她卖出去了，卖给了另一个家庭，收了一大笔钱。但是，也有很多人说，彩礼是一种传统文化，而且彩礼也没有那么糟糕。因为中国文化里还有一个词叫“嫁妆”，也就是新娘的父母给新娘和新郎准备的礼物。很多新娘的父母，会把新郎给的彩礼，当作嫁妆，也会给新娘和新郎买车，或者给另外一笔钱。所以，在很多情况下，彩礼和嫁妆都是新郎和新娘的父母给他们的新家庭准备的资金。

但是现在问题在哪里呢？问题出在很多人给不起这个钱。有时候女性的父母会向男性的父母要很多钱，如果没有拿到这么多钱，就不同意他们结婚。如果这位女性有弟弟或者哥哥，这种情况会很常见。因为以后这位女性的弟弟或者哥哥结婚时，女生的父母也要给很多彩礼，所以他们在女儿结婚的时候，就要收很多彩礼钱。

除了彩礼和嫁妆，结婚还要花很多钱。比如，很多人结婚要办婚宴，需要邀请很多亲人和朋友一起吃饭。婚宴，至少需要花几万元，也可以到几十万元，或者一百万元以上。很多人在结婚以前要买房子，但是中国城市的房子特别贵。

为什么结婚需要花这么多钱呢？因为在很多中国人的传统观念里，结婚是两个家庭的事情，不只是两个人的事情，所以，新郎的家要付彩礼钱，新娘的家要付钱买嫁妆，婚宴要办得很大，房子也一定要买。但是，现在一些中国年轻人都在说不。他们要么不结婚，要么很简单地结了婚。我相信，等这些年轻人当了父母以后，他们也会让他们的孩子自己做选择。

以后，在中国结婚还需要花很多钱吗？我们以后一起观察观察吧！

今天的MaoMi Chinese 就先到这里。我最近在网站和MaoMi Chinese的instagram上都收到了一些听众的鼓励和留言，非常谢谢你们！

Hello everyone. Welcome back to MaoMi Chinese.

Today I would like to talk about one of the most important issues of our lives - getting married. In Chinese culture, getting married is one of the most important parts of people’s lives. However, now there are many young people who don’t want to get married. Why? Because it’s too expensive to get married.

Many young men are stressed because of getting married. For thousands of years in Chinese culture, there has been a word called ‘bride price’. What is that? Before marriage, the groom and his parents need to give the bride and her family a large amount of money. How much money they need to pay for the ‘bride price’ depends on where they are. In some places, they might need a few thousand yuan, a few dozen thousand yuan, and in some places, they might need a few hundred thousand.

I personally don’t like the idea of ‘bride price’ because it seems like women are just commodities, and her family sold her to another family for a large amount of money. However, there are many people saying that ‘bride price’ is also part of traditional culture, and it is not horrible. There is another word called ‘dowry’ in Chinese culture, which is the present given by the bride’s parents to the bride and the groom. Many parents of the bride will take the ‘bride price’, given by the groom as their daughter’s ‘dowry’, and also buy the bride and groom a car or some money. Therefore, in many cases, ‘bride price’ and ‘dowry’ are the funds prepared for the bride and groom’s new family by their parents.

But now what is the problem? The problem is that many people can’t afford it. Sometimes the woman’s parents will ask for lots of money from the man’s parents, and if they don’t get the money, they won’t say yes to the marriage. If this woman has a younger or older brother, this kind of case is very common, because when her brothers get married, her parents will need to pay lots of ‘bride price’. Therefore, they have to charge lots of ‘bride price’ when their daughter gets married.

Apart from ‘bride price’ and ‘dowry’, people also need to spend a lot on other things. For example, many people would like to host a wedding party and need to invite lots of family and friends. A wedding party will cost at least a few thousand yuan, a few hundred thousand yuan, or even over 1 million yuan. Many people want to buy a house before getting married, but houses in Chinese cities are especially expensive.

Why does it cost so much money to get married? Because in many people’s traditional idea, getting married is a matter of two families, not just two people. Therefore, the groom’s family needs to pay for the ‘bride price’ and the bride’s family needs to pay for the ‘dowry’. Also, the wedding party needs to be big, and buying a house is necessary. However, there are some young Chinese people who are saying no to that. They either refuse to get married or just get married in a very simple way. I believe that when these young people become parents one day, they would let their children make their own choices.

In the future, will getting married still cost lots of money? Let’s wait and see!

That’s about it for MaoMi Chinese today. I recently received some very nice comments and messages from the website and Instagram. Thank you very much!