#34 Full-time Dad is a great job! 全职奶爸也很伟大

Podcast Transcript

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大家好,欢迎回来MaoMi Chinese。最近,在中国的互联网,有一位男明星受到了很多关注和讨论。这个男明星叫李承铉,他是一位美籍韩国人。他是一个歌手,也是一个演员。他的妻子是一位中国的女演员,他们现在和女儿一起住在北京。但是最特别的是,在他的女儿出生以后,李承铉的妻子在外边工作,李承铉自己当了全职奶爸六年。

什么是全职奶爸呢?全职,意思是full-time。如果我们要说part-time,那就是兼职。奶爸,意思是小宝宝的爸爸。因为小宝宝每天都要喝奶,所以奶爸也有喂小宝宝喝奶的意思。

在中国社会里,现在大多数的家庭都是男主外,女主内。“男主外,女主内”是什么意思呢?我们知道外,是外边的意思,outside。内,是里边的意思,inside。男主外,女主内,意思是男人主要在外边工作,赚钱,养家。女人主要在家里照顾孩子,做家务。但是,现在很多女人也都要工作,所以,妈妈不仅要照顾孩子,而且要在外边工作,特别辛苦。

有一部分人不明白李承铉为什么要做全职奶爸,因为他们觉得男人应该在外边工作,赚钱。这些人的观念比较旧,比较落后。有些人还会说,当全职奶爸是吃软饭。吃软饭,在中国是一个不好的词,侮辱人的词。我们知道饭,是米饭,软,是soft,吃软饭,是靠女人的意思。对很多人来说,吃软饭很丢脸。但是我很想对李承铉,还有所有的全职奶爸们说,全职妈妈很伟大,全职奶爸也一样很伟大。他们愿意花时间照顾孩子,教育孩子。这不是一件简单的事情,这是很艰难的工作。李承铉在电视采访中也分享了他当全职奶爸的感受。我们一起来听一听:

“我觉得教育孩子是一个非常难的工作。我想要当什么样的父亲?但是在这个过程中,我发现我自己,在太逼迫她,在某一件事情上。然后,我自己的情绪也没控制好。这个情绪,不纯粹是来源于她的对与错,也是来源于我自己当时的情绪。我的烦恼,我的不管是别的压力来的,我就传达给她。凶了她以后,她在睡觉的时候,就有一种情绪,我那段时间是真的有点崩溃了。就是,白天就,她睡的时候就有一种,就不知不觉地就自己哭。看着她就觉得,“我对不起你”。我重新做一个承诺,就明天我要怎么样,然后看一堆这种教育的一些书,我怎么样可以当一个比较好的父母。怎么样,应该教育要怎么样。这个来回的过程很艰难。"

他说他在教育孩子的时候,没有控制好自己的情绪。情绪,意思是我们的感受,比如开心,难过,生气,等等。他也说那段时间他有点崩溃。说一个人崩溃,意思是他压力太大了,情绪太多了,受不了。最后他说,教育孩子,这个过程很艰难。

所以,对男人和女人来说,教育孩子都很艰难。全职妈妈和全职爸爸,他们都很伟大。现在在中国,还有一些人不明白,不理解,为什么要当全职奶爸。他们觉得全职奶爸是吃软饭,这是完全不对的。他们都是伟大的父母。

最后我们一起再说一说今天的词语和表达吧!

第一个,全职,full-time。全职奶爸和全职妈妈是很伟大的工作。如果我们想说part-time,那就是兼职。比如,她是一个兼职老师。

第二个,男主外,女主内。男人在外边工作,女人在家里照顾孩子。在中国很多家庭都是男主外,女主内,但也有一些家庭是女主外,男主内。妈妈在外边工作,爸爸在家照顾孩子。

第三个,吃软饭,意思是说男人依靠女人,这不是一个特别好的词。对男人和女人都不尊重。

第四个, 情绪,意思是我们的感受,好的感受,不好的感受,开心,生气,难过,等等。比如,我们每天有各种各样的情绪,但是我们要控制自己的情绪。

第五个,崩溃,意思是一个人压力太大了,情绪太多了,他受不了,要崩溃。你可以说,我最近工作太多了,太忙了,我要崩溃了。

第六个,艰难,tough and difficult。比如,教育孩子的过程很艰难。学习中文的过程可能会很艰难,但是一定会有收获。

那么今天的MaoMi Chinese就先到这里,我们下个星期见!

Hello everyone. Welcome back to MaoMi Chinese. Recently on the Chinese Internet, there has been a male celebrity who's got lots of concern and discussion about him. He is called Nathan Scott Lee, who is an American Korean. He’s a singer as well as an actor. His wife is a Chinese actress and now they live in Beijing with their daughter. But the most special thing is that after their daughter was born, Lee’s wife has been working and Lee himself has been a full-time daddy for 6 years.

What is 全职奶爸? 全职,means full-time. If we would like to say part-time, then this would be 兼职。奶爸,means little babies’ dad. Because little babies have to drink milk every day, 奶爸 also got the meaning of feeding babies milk.

In Chinese society, so far in most families, men work outside and women look after their families. What does it mean? We know that 外means outside, 内,means inside. 男主外,女主内, means that men mainly work outside, make money and support the family. Women mainly look after children at home and do housework. However, now lots of women also have to work. Therefore, mums have to not only look after children but also work. It’s especially hard.

There is a part of people who don’t know why Lee had to be a full-time dad, as they think that men should work and make money. These people’s ideas are rather old and behind the time. Some people even said that being a full-time dad is ‘eating soft rice’吃软饭。吃软饭 is not a nice word in China, and kind of insulting. We know 饭is rice, and 软is soft. Eating soft rice means relying on women. To many people this is something that makes people ‘lose face’.  But I would like to tell Lee and all full-time dads that being a full-time dad is a great job, the same as those full-time mums. They are happy to spend time looking after their children and do lots of parenting. This is not an easy thing and it’s very tough and difficult. Lee shared his feeling of being a full-time dad in a TV interview. Let’s have a listen:

“I think that educating children is a really difficult job. What kind of father that I want to be? But during that, I realised I was pushing her too much for something. My emotion was not well controlled either. This kind of emotion was not purely from her doing right or not, it was also from how I felt at that moment. My anxiety or my pressure wherever they were from, were all passed to her. After telling her off, when she was sleeping, I got some kind of emotion that really broke me down. In the daytime, I was like (telling her off), but when she sleeps I would cry for no reason. While looking at her I felt like ‘Daddy feels very sorry for you’. Then I would make a promise again, like tomorrow I need to do this and that. I also watched a pile of books about parenting, like how I could be a good parent and what parenting should be like. This kind of process was really rough and difficult.”

He said that when he was doing parenting, he did not control his emotion well, which means feelings, like feeling happy, sad, angry and so on. He also said that during that period of time he was a bit broken-down. To say someone is broken-down, it means that he/she has too much pressure and emotion, and he/she can’t bear it. In the end, he said that the process of parenting/educating children is really tough and difficult.

Therefore, to both men and women, parenting/educating children is tough and difficult. Full-time mums and dads are all great people. So far in China, there are still some people who don’t know and understand why someone chooses to be a full-time dad. They think that being a full-time dad is just relying on their wife, which is completely wrong. They are actually great parents!

At the end let’s talk about today’s vocabulary and expressions again!

1 全职,full-time. Full-time dad and full-time mum are great jobs. If we would like to say part-time then it will be 兼职, for example, she is a part-time teacher.

2 男主外,女主内, which means that men work and women look after children at home. There are lots of Chinese families who are like that, but there are also some families where the mum works and the dad looks after the children at home.

3 吃软饭, which means that a man is relying on a woman (his girlfriend or wife). This is not a very nice word and is not respectful to either men or women.

4 情绪,emotion,all kinds of feeling, no matter they are good or not, like happy, angry, sad and so on. For example, every day we have all kinds of feelings but we need to control our own feelings.

5 崩溃, breakdown, which means someone is having too much pressure and emotion and he/she can’t stand it. You can say that I have done too much work recently and has been too busy. I am going to break down.

艰难,tough and difficult. For example, the process of parenting/educating children is very tough and difficult. The process of learning Chinese might be tough and difficult but we will definitely have an outcome.

That’s all about today. We will see again next week!

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